Check out that cute little corgi. (S)He’s so chill and relaxed. Surely (s)he’s discovered Sabbath. This is something that I feel most Christians have yet to do. I didn’t really realize that I had truly discovered it until today. We talk about it all the time. It’s the day of rest. The day we worship God. The time for a break. We don’t work. “Man wasn’t made for the Sabbath…” we quote when we don’t do these things. But how many of us have actually discovered it? And been able to live in it?
The purpose of Sabbath is simple- remember that God is God and take a break. Even God rested on Sabbath. Traditionally, it is now observed on Sunday. But it doesn’t have to be. I’ve found that mine is on Sunday. But all that matters is finding one day a week to live in rest; in peace; in contentment.
For me, the most important (and probably the most controversial) part of discovering Sabbath was stopping attending church. “But Church is where you celebrate Sabbath!” many of you are crying out. But hear me out.
There is nothing wrong with the church, in and of itself. What doesn’t work for me is the functioning of most churches today. And how they hurt my Sabbath. To me, rest is not:
- getting up earlier than I want
- going to a crowded room of people I barely know and have superficial (at best) relationships with,
- to sing songs with mixed and often contradictory[note]if not outright bad[/note] theology
- followed by a sermon improperly pulled from proof texts
- ending with awkward “The Jesus Masquerade” conversation[note]the conversations where everyone pretends their lives are all sunshine and rainbows[/note]
By the time I get home, the day is half over, I’ve exceeded my personal quota of energy for the day already, and I’m still wrestling with the lyrics of the songs and the message because they just don’t fit.
And, God forbid, if I don’t go to church on a given Sunday not only do I feel guilty personally, but I get some form of contact from someone in the church asking where I’ve been.
That’s not rest. That’s work. And I’ll be honest, at first, after not attending church for a while I did feel guilty still. My parents ask if I’ve found a church in ‘Bama yet. And another friend has asked as well. The honest answer is that I’m not even looking for one. I have other reasons for not being involved in a church at this time, but them hindering my Sabbath is definitely one of them. They leave me drained. They don’t fulfill me. And that’s okay. Sabbath isn’t about going to church; it’s not about doing all the right things. Remember, Sabbath is made for us, not us for it. There’s no right or wrong way to have Sabbath.
(And for those of you who are wondering, I am still getting community with fellow believers. I’m not attending a physical church at the moment, but I am part of a beautiful online community[note]and, yes, online community is just as valid as in-person community[/note] that I find more beneficial to my life as a whole and my walk with God than any physical church I’ve ever been a part of. We’re a collection of broken and hurting people doing our best to serve each other and God in any way we can. That’s the very definition of Church in it’s truest form.)
So, beyond just no longer attending a church, how did I discover my Sabbath? And how do I know?
For a few weeks now I’ve noticed a trend in my moods. I’ll be depressed and feeling down on Saturdays (and even a few days before) and then Sunday will roll around and I won’t be. But then Monday comes again and my depression is back.
Sundays are my Sabbath. My day repose. A day for me. And I spend them doing things that may seem like work to others, but to me they’re rest. Blogging. Making music. Reading. These are the things that empower me on my Sabbath. They give me energy. They make me feel rested and at one with not only myself but God.
For others, they may be work. And that’s fine. Find things to do on your Sabbath that make you feel the same way these make me feel.
But I’ve finally found my Sabbath, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
